I watched the documentary 40 year old virgins on 4oD last night. By the way it is nothing like the film, it follows a 40 year old man who has never had sex, that is until he meets what is known a ‘surrogate sex partner’.
It has serious cringe factor in it so prepare yourself if decide to watch it, anyway the one barrier for him was getting naked with another person. I often think we all feel this way (metaphorically speaking).
For a moment, imagine that you have walked into a crowded room, it is busy, everyone is talking, you recognise some of the people and some of them are strangers to you. You feel awkward, people are talking but they aren’t acknowledging you, you think they may be talking about you. Your body is paralysed by fear, you are suffering with the white mist, every corner of the room seems like it is miles away. The feeling of anxiety is enhanced due to fact that you are completely naked. Everyone can see that you are naked and there is nothing you can do about it. Then you wake up.
Dreams about being naked in a busy room can mean different things depending on the context
However the one I have described is likely to have a meaning of feeling vulnerable or anxious, now imagine this:
You walk into a crowded room and you are wearing zero clothing. It doesn’t faze you in any way, you approach people, and you meet them and greet them shaking their hand with a smile. You feel light, free and liberated. You have no concern with what people are thinking; they can think what they like about you, because you are comfortable in your own skin, you have an air of confidence about you, you feel tall, when you speak you feel calm and your voice resonates and fills the room. People listen and want to hear what you have to say. They haven’t even noticed that you are naked.
Have you ever noticed how someone can get away with wearing a scruffy tee shirt and still have a presence?
Getting comfortable with being naked in a crowded room is a metaphor for unlocking your presence.
You are effectively stripping off the layers or the ‘armour’ you are using to protect your ego. An egoless life is a free life. Getting comfortable with your vulnerability is the key to freeing yourself from fear and anxiety. Great leaders and athletes don’t achieve presence by shouting the loudest or sticking their chest out to get noticed, they are humble, open to change and letting go of their ego.